"Pets or Meat"

If you've ever watched the Michael Moore documentary on the unemployment crisis in Flint, Michigan like I have then you'll know where the title to this post came from:)

Here's the clip in question, from the documentary Roger and Me:

Hey don't look at me, I wasn't the one that did that to the poor bunny:(

Anyways here's a more light-hearted take on Animal rights.
Enjoy!

The Hunter: "I loves ya' Kelly ol' gal. Ever since I ate ol' Bessy, I've been hankerin' for a hunk of sweet, sweet moo patties."

Kelly: "Moo, moo? Moooo!"

Animal Man: "Hold on citizen! Meat is murder!

The Hunter: "Awww shoot! Not this horse-shit again. Nawww you hold on there city-slicker. I can's do what I want 'cause own this here steer ya' hear?"

The Hunter: "Now what'cha goin' do about that mister?"

Animal Man: "How tall are you?"

The Hunter: "The hell does it matter? How long's a piece of string? Too Got-damn long that's what!"

Animal Man: "Hmm. Good enough."

Animal Man kicks the hunter.

-Yeah I know it looks horrible, but I couldn't very well take a good picture of Animal Man kicking the poor bastard since the A-Man figure had an annoying tendency to fall over when he's only balanced on one foot. So work with me here people.

Hunter: "Aggggh!"

Animal Man: "I hope he wasn't a midget, because I'd hate to have think I'd just committed a hate crime."

Animal Man: "Let's go Kelly. We can get a nice tofu wrap or you know, whatever you're in the mood for. That sound good to you?"

Kelly: "Mooooo!"

Animal Man: "Ha ha ha. You said a mouthful."

Hunter: "Ughhhhh! I think I'ma gonna' retire from this here skit business. Ughhhh!"

"Animal crackers in my soup...."

Captain Atom: " Well, if it isn't PETA's favorite super-hero, Animal Man!"

Animal Man: (Singing)"Animal crackers in my soup, monkeys and rabbits, loop de loop.

Hey cap. I was just going to the grocery store to pick up some things for the wife and kids. You need anything?"

Captain Atom: "Yeah, how about making it 2004 again, or better yet, 1986 while you're at it. And don't forget the industrial-sized can of whoop-ass for the whole damn DC corporation!"

Animal Man: "Wow, someone's in a bad mood."

Captain Atom: "You can say that again. God I hate this stupid company! Is it too much to ask to not be rebooted every 5 minutes? For the love of God, I'm a slightly altered human being not a laptop!"

Animal Man: "This whole NuDCU thing not working out for you I take it then?"

Captain Atom: "Did ya' gain the attention span abilities of a dolphin? Of course I'm not happy with the NuDCU! They're trying to turn me into Dr.Manhattan from the Watchmen. Do you think I'm happy with being turned into a second-rate, naked copy of myself?"

                                        Animal Man: "I guess not. Well at least my book's doing well. It's a spooky good run by the crafty Jeff Lemire. I haven't been this popular since Morrison was writing about me."

                                      Captain Atom: "I hope I give you cancer just from standing next to me.

-Ben says Animal Man should suffer from an extremely lower sperm count as well. he's right and I should've thought of that. Damn! I'm slippin'.

-Extras:

Animal Man: "Oh wow, I finally made it into one of these skits I'm always hearing about. Cool Beans!"

Captain Atom: "I'm just sure the wife and kids are thrilled for you."

Animal Man: "What was that?"

Captain Atom: "I said I'm thrilled for you. Welcome to the club. Ass-clown."