Monday, June 4, 2012

Short-Shots 2:Attack of the Son of Short-Shot....

Hey People,
having a bitch of a time with my internet, so excuse the delays.

I've had a hell of a weekend, and not the good kind of hell either! I won't bore you guys with the details, because if you wanted to hear/read someone moping about how unfair life is, you'd simply listen to an emo music channel or something. Suffice to say, life isn't and leave it at that.

Someone said "Life is a shit sandwich sometimes, and we all have to take a big bite and swallow." Truer words have never been spoken.

But enough with all that, you came here for the funny(I hope), so let's get to it.

The 1st short skit features the two Batmen I have, the Detective version, and the GA version. I've been wanting to do this particular skit for awhile, but just now got off my lazy ass to make it. Enjoy.

Batman: "Time for bed young man. You have to hit the books hard in the morning, plus your early morning workout."

Robin: "Awwww, but Bruuuce. I don't want to go to bed early. I think I'm old enough to stay up to 10:00pm now, don't you think?"

Batman: "You heard me Dick. Time for bed."

Robin: "Gosh darnnit! Green Arrow lets Roy stay up late."

Batman: "And that's why Roy's doing so well now as a drooling, drugged-up idiot."

Robin: "You're a drooling idiot!"

Batman: "What was that?"

Robin: "Nothing"

GA Batman: "Bruce, it's way past your bedtime young man. "

Batman: "Awwww, but daaaaaad. You said I could stay up late tonight!"

GA Batman: "No buts young man, or else I'll spank yours. Off to bed with you now."

Robin: "Ha ha. You have to go to bed early too."

Batman: "Shut it Dick!"

And finally, here's a skit Dan can get behind, mostly because it's filled with his two favorite fellow Aussies:

Captain Boomerang: "Oi ya' wallaby-lovin', fire-startin' Billy. How the hell are ya'?"

Pyro: "Well if it isn't my favorite bludgerin' bluey? How are ya' ya' damn bogan you? Going to chuck a sickie are ya?"

-Now Imagine furbies, but speaking Austrailan. Yes, it's still gibberish you can't understand. But it's worse. It's with an accent. That's these two.

Cap'n Boomerang: "Come on ya' cockie, let's go out for a coldie."

Pyro: "Can we go to the nearby Outback Steakhouse you reckon?"

Cap'n Boomerang: "Now why would wanna' go to that piss-poor place you silly dag you? They ain't even a proper dinkin Australian restaurant."

Pyro: "I know. That's why I want to go there and burn the whole place to the ground, right along with all those stupid bloody gits! I'll cock a fat watching those bloody yanks burn to death. Well that and the bloomin onion. Amazing appetizer it is."

Cap'n Boomerang: "That's what I like about you Pyro ya' crazy dunny rat. You're always good for a laugh. But now that you mention it, a bloomin' onion and a right mug of Fosters' is right what the doctor ordered."

Both men singing at the same time:

"We come from the land down under. Where women glow and men plunder? 
Can't you hear, can't you hear the thunder? 
You better run, you better take cover." 


And no, I didn't cock a fat when I thought of you Dan. Damn you Aussies have some weird fucking slang! I swear man......






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