Fresh off the presses, is a short one, but a funny one(I hope) today people.
I was thinking, as I usually do, about what topic or joke I'm going to create a skit around, and then it hit me: "How to catch a predator." And from there the ball kept rolling.
Enjoy!
-The Punisher looks at Kamandi, noticing the boy holding enough guns to make him an honorary junior NRA member.
The Punisher: "I hear ya. Sometimes its just one of those days you know?"
Kamandi: "What?"
The Punisher: "Yeah, just one of those days where you absolutely, positively want to blow every motherfucker in the room away. I hear ya' kid. I get those days too."
Kamandi: "Uh, are you hitting on me? Because I know Chris Hansen man."
Punisher: "Hey I'm no filthy pedophile, I'm just admiring a nice young man like yourself holding a lot of firepower and looking like he just escaped from the planet of the apes or something is all."
Kamandi: "Yeah, I'm going to ease on out real slow, so no funny business mister!"
Later on that day.....
And here's some Chris Hansen joke pics I found on the 'net:
Nice.
I was big fan of the show when it was on, as I loved to see the hapless fools get lured in and exposed for the pathetic perverts they were. And good god were there plenty of those!
Rabbi's, Cops, and Truckers oh my!
And they'd all swear the same thing; "I wasn't going to have sex with him/her. I just wanted to talk."
Awesome-sauce right there.
Too bad the show didn't last as long as I'd have liked. Why you my ask? Because, in the mother of all ironies, Chris Hansen was caught in a sting by the National Enquirer cheating on his wife. And that's not all...nope dear Mr. Hansen also sexted his new paramour, costing him his marriage, and his job, seeing as how at the time he was supposed to be the new head anchor of Dateline. Not after that scandal broke he wasn't. Thus why no more Chris Hansen, and no more To Catch A Predator.
Nice Hansen. Real nice.
Finally, I'll leave you to watch some funny moments from the show:
And this one of a guy with Cerbal Palsy trying to score with a 13 year-old.
Hey people, I don't why, but that title sure sounds familiar you know:) Kinda' catchy.
So we're now in the Summer months homestretch, as July makes way for August, and the sounds of loud children on their way to school will soon be heard echoing throughout the streets.
Personally I can't wait for Fall, as this fucking heat is unbearable! And that's with air-conditioning. Seriously, anybody tells you global-warming and the greenhouse effect isn't real, is full of shit!
So allow me to hopefully supply you guys with bit of a distraction with yes, another bat-themed skit. What? You know you guys like 'em.
-Batman chases Catwoman throughout the streets of Gotham City.
Batman: "Here kitty, here kitty, here kitty, here kittaaaaaay! I tawt I saw I puddy tat!"
Catwoman: "Really Bruce? Here kitty, kitty? What, did you just now discover the 69 Boyz or something? Bruce, that song hasn't been cool since 1995!"
Batman: "Why must I be like that? Why must I chase the cat? Nothing but the bat in meee!"
Catwoman: "*Sigh* And to think......I was actually going to sleep with him. Stupid Selina."
Batman: "Meowww, woff, woff!"
Damn! Maybe Batman is wound too tight these days.
And how was your weekend?
Mine was pretty good, and next two are going to be even better me, as this weekend(Saturday to be exact) marks my 31st birthday. Yeah, yeah, don't rub it in, I'm old I know:(
So I'm heading up north for a father-son male bonding trip, and then the weekend after that, it's time to visit Heroes and Dragons; my not-so local comic shop. Good times I tell ya'.
And as always, I always face a dilemma; buy a shit-load of cheap back issue for my collection, or blow all my money on action figures. And yes, as of late, the action figures win. Trust me, it's a sickness. But like a junkie who doesn't want to be cured, I gladly go back for more. Crazy I tell yeah, crazy.
Of course things are a bit dry action figure-wise where I'm at, as the 2 Marvel Legends waves have long since come and gone, and won't be re-stocked with new waves until September. Well that's what they say, but who knows when I'll actually see them here.
All I know is that I'm psyched for the new ML US Agent figure coming out in this new upcoming wave. Fucking sweet!
And as is tradition here, I'll leave you folks with something to dance to. Yes it's time for a little Kitty, kitty action with those 69 Boyz!
Lady Bird Johnson Grove. I think the fog makes my photo look like a painting.
The redwood curtain is what they call the redwood thick highways that lead up to and border the very Northern part of California and separate it from the rest of the state. This area is a true dichotomy, a mix a liberal hippies and loggers. We just returned from our yearly trek up to the top of California, to Humboldt County about 300 miles north of San Francisco. My husband Max grew up in Trinidad, a beautiful small beach town up there. His step-mom Marguerite, lives in the college town Arcata and his mother in the Victorian lined and hilly Eureka, both in Humboldt. We stayed there and met up with his sister Amara, from Washington. It's a long 7 hour drive above the Bay Area, but so gorgeous. Each time I go, I appreciate even more the beauty of this very unique area. Funny though, how most Californians have not been up to Humboldt. Ask anyone and they know where it is, but it's the rare person who has actually been up here.
Since the drive is a bit of a haul, I try to find unique spots to stop at on the way up. Heading out you know it's going to be a nice day when you cross the bridge and the fog's burning off.
My latest find is the town of Ukiah. It's about at the half-way point of the drive. They have a bakery I am in love with. Schat's is a treasure! It's been run by a Dutch family that has been in the bread business a long time. They have the most fresh and amazing sandwiches. I had a caesar salad wrap- yum. Also they make artisanal breads (amazing!), baked goods and Peet's coffee. Get off at the Perkins Street exit in Ukiah off 101 and follow the signs to downtown. If you head up that way on a Saturday check out the darling farmer's market, The Mendocino Bookstore and a cool shop called Habitat.
Schat's
Driving up 101 you pass through wine country (that's a whole post itself), and hit the rolling foothills covered in oak trees. That's the beginning of the North Coast Redwoods and the towns of Willits, Laytonville, Garberville and others. It gets a little funkier and you start seeing lots of shops like this...
All your tie dye needs can be met up this way :) In Laytonville.
This is also where you start to see lots of, "indoor gardening," and solar stores and the beginning of hitchhikers! Yep, they are still around all over up here. One scruffy group of hitchers had a heart on their cardboard sign that read, "We don't bite!" OMG! I just wish I had the camera for that. My boys were like,"What??"
The whole thing brings me back to my childhood days driving to Santa Cruz with hitchhikers all over highway 17. I am here to report the 1970s are still alive and thriving up in the North Coast! That is not an exaggeration. Folks are still embracing peace, love and the braless look up there big time too. Not that I was looking, but you know sometimes it's like you just can't help noticing how umm, natural everyone is up here. It's a bit different....People we have left the bubble!
Trinidad, Max's hometown, is an historic whaling port. We always make a trek and hike around the village, it's beach and port and the trails off the ocean. This visit I was keen to check out this organic cafe that opened across the street from my husband's old grammar school, The Beachcomber Cafe.
It's a groovy spot opened by three gals that serves organic and all local produce. Lovely scones, muffins and homemade granola and so much more are served here! No paper cups to go here for their fantastic coffee, but you can buy a jam jar for $1 that you can return later. I love that! Locals also have a wall for their running tabs. Live music was happening on Sunday morning. It's a very unique and fun stop. Don't miss this in Trinidad. You can wander around this village, it's trails, the beaches and the seaport. Some snaps below.
A trail along Trinidad State Beach above.
Can you believe my husband grew up across the street from this beach? This was his view out the living room window. He says he didn't appreciate how cool it was to watch whales from his windows all the time!
Walking toward the port -and below the port and it's sailboats. Below the port.
Last summer my boys went to surf camp at Moonstone Beach. It is also in Trinidad and a great beach to learn at because of it's shallow entry. The only thing is you'll need to wear a full wet suit. Even in summer!
Past Trinidad, about a half hour North is Fern Canyon, part of Prairie Creek Redwoods State Park. On this trail, you follow a stream for about a mile over footbridges and logs. The walls all around you are up to 80 feet high with ferns and waterfalls. This is where Jurassic Park 2 was filmed. It's truly one of the gems of Northern Cal and possibly the world. I don't know of anyplace remotely like this. These pictures just don't do it justice. It's hard to see the waterfalls in them.
Following the creek...and crossing the footbridges they put out in summer.
Guess I should have packed more snacks... I don't think redwood sorrel counts as a vegetable!
It's so wet here people do their graffiti on moss! Do you know that redwood is so resistant to rot that a downed redwood tree can survive hundreds of years on the forest floor and may even sprout new trees? Really!
About ten minutes away from Fern Canyon is Lady Bird Johnson Grove, an old growth redwood forest. It undoubtedly has some of the oldest trees on earth here. Redwoods shoot up and do most of their growth in the first 100-200 years. Then they drop their lower branches. After 1000 years they begin to expand their width. You can see from the sizes of these trees they are VERY old.
The hike here is about a mile total flat, but you are at 1200 feet up. You literally feel like you are in the clouds. These trees are awe-inspiring. You cannot see the tops of them. When they get high enough they form a canopy or some call it a cathedral sort of grove. Lady Bird Grove has one of these. Unfortunately my Nikon battery was dead! All my photos are from the iPhone. Not too bad though..
You can see the massive size of these trees standing next to them...
And looking up! Can you believe this was a phone camera? Very foggy that day.
Some hijinks with Max's sister Amara and her husband Brian!
We found hobbits too!
My husband could not resist!
Our crew..
And Max's step-mom Marguerite and her son Patrick.
The forest here is filled with wild roses and rhododendrons!
Next up, I'll show you the rest of the trip!
I just love sharing this very undiscovered part of Northern California!
As today's title says, it's time for a little show and tell by yours truly, featuring some art by........yours truly. Hey I never met a shameless plug I didn't like, especially if it's mine. Well that, and to show Shlomo that he hasn't totally cornered the market in posting original works:)
Okay so they're not totally original, but fuck it, sue me!
So without further ado, let's get this puff article, ahem, I mean credible piece rolling shall we?
First up is a little project I was inspired to make after re-reading an old article in Wizard Magazine about the then promising concept mini by DC called Countdown:Arena. Remember that abortion? Yeah I guess not, and I don't blame you. Basically the premise was that it would feature a battle royal where various Elseworlds versions of popular characters, like Kingdom Come GL or Vampire Batman would fight it out WWF(E)-style in order to be chosen to join Monarch's(Captain Atom) army. This army would invade countless multiverse worlds, and, I'm not sure what else after that. Nobody planned out what would happen if they actually succesful I guess. Typical DC. Anyhoo, one of the dream match-ups was the Dark Knight Returns version of Batman vs. The Watchmen's Rorschach.
Unfortunately that one never happened, despite the tease, so I went ahead and set this little piece up myself. Of course it's not the DKR Batman, but it is the current version instead. Maybe I'll make a DKR version later.
Other than the slight differences in choice of logos, I also alter the lightening effect in the 2nd piece. You know, just in case you didn't catch it.
Personally, it doesn't matter what era or interpretation of Batman Rorschach fighting, as I see it Batman's Batman and will win every time. That doesn't mean Rorschach will make it easy on him, as we all saw during his stay in prison and his short battle against the cops, Rorschach may be nowhere as good a fighter as Batman, but he's also no cherry. He fights dirty and plays for keeps, and is also very resourceful when he needs to be, so I don't see this contest going super-smooth for Bruce. But he'll win just the same. A word of advice to you Bats, whatever you do, don't take his "face" off until he's knocked the fuck out. Trust me. Pulling his mask off, is like spinach to Popeye; it's not to going end well for whoever's on the other side of that ass-whooping.
Next up, is good ol' Superman. I snatched this iconic image off one of the solicitations for another one of his hardcover Showcase editions.
The theme here, and I use that term loosely, is Superman's minding his own business, flying around and all, and then accidently flies into a weird dimensional barrier/nexus-thingy where he encounters a dimensional Bizzaro version of himself. And no, not Bizzaro as in the regular one who's his opposite, but as in a Superman that hails from another dimension. I think.
The last one dimensional Superman piece was done using a filter tool called "Predator." No kidding folks, the very same effect that you see here that gives you the impression that you're using the Predator's infra-red heat vision is appropriately named Predator. I like the effect, but it kinda' gets old quick after the initial fun's run out. Plus, how many times can you truthfully use this effect where it actually makes sense to use it? Yeah me too.
Then there's little morsel I just completed today; It's old stone-face himself, Darkseid.
Finally something I can actually agree with him on:)
This beaut comes courtesy of the new DC Direct Darkseid statue that's coming out this fall. Personally I'll always prefer Papa Kirby's version, but this one isn't that bad. It kinda' looks like he's wearing space armor or something huh?
Now I don't know if they ever did, but if DC Direct ever came out with a "Rock of Ages" statue version of Darkseid, that would be fucking sweet! I didn't think Darkseid could look as bad-ass as he did when Kirby was drawing him, but man did Howard Porter's version of Darkseid filtered through the imagination of Grant Morrison make him look even more like a Bad-ass! I swear that fucker looked pimp! I think DC agreed since a somewhat similar version of that outfit showed up in Final Crisis.
Alright, alright. I can see you're looking bored, so I'll stop. Damn you people are rough crowd. Who shit in your corn flakes today?
I kid, I kid, you guys are alright.
Finally, I was recently re-reading the 1st two issues of Azrael by Legend and master story-teller Denny O'Neil and Barry Kitson. Folks, I'm not kidding when I say that that series was vastly underrated and under-appreciated. It lasted what, almost 90 issues, and featured the guy who was the replacement Batman for almost two years. Trust me, when this first came out, Azrael was hot. And yes I only own two issues of the entire series, but I stand by my assessment of this book. Plus, in an age when like now, creative teams didn't and don't last as long as the team of O'Neil and Kitson did. It just doesn't happen people. Think about it, they lasted(with the exception of Kitson who left shortly before the series was cancelled) the entire length of the series from beginning to end. Say what you will, but that's a hell of an accomplishment by any stretch.
But I digress.
The point I was attempting to make, is that in the back of the 2nd issue of Azrael, O'Neil talks briefly about where the need for Jean Paul Valley, a.k.a. Azrael came from, and how he ended up with his own series. Well the point that really jumped out at me, was when O'Neil talks about doing research in finding a natural enemy for Bats. Well they don't have any except us silly humans, so that was a no-go. So he looks up religious mythology, and comes across the name "Azrael". He goes "jackpot", and goes from there. Basically if Batman, as seen through the lens of religious iconography, is seen as a demon doing good, then the Azrael character should be seen as an angel doing bad. Nice dichotomy there.
Don't worry I'm getting to the point. While researching natural enemies of bats, O'Neil initially considered using a characters based off an Owl. Hmmm. Does that sound familiar? It damn well should, since the whole "Court of Owls" storyline just wrapped up.
Here in his own words, is the reason why Denny didn't go with the whole Owl concept: "Among their airborne contemporaries, their only real foes are owls. Anything we can do with owls, then? Well owls are predators, but they had great public relations over the centuries: the popular notion of an owl is not that of a feathered terror who swoops from the night sky yo make a snack of a small beastie, but of a placid old critter perched on a limb being benign and wise. Definitely not what we were looking for."
Interesting little tidbit huh? I guess its a good thing current Bat-scribe Scott Synder didn't agree with that opinion or else we'd have been stuck with what? a court of man-people? Pigeons? Koalas?
I don't know if Synder ever read or remembered that, but oh the delicious irony huh? See, who says you can't learn anything here @ the House of Fun?
Sadly, after re-reading those issues, and writing this post, I've come to really feel bad about not buying that kick-ass Az-Batman DCUC action figure while I had the chance:(
And now for a parting song to usher you all on out of the house. This song comes courtesy of one of my favorite rock bands ever, and in the top five, and number five, Pink Floyd. Here's their hit(well not at the time) "The Nile song."
I swear if you listen to it, you'd be like "So that's where Nirvana got there sound from..." and you'd probably be partially right. This song is not typical of Pink Floyd, as they really rock here with a very heavy, almost metal-like sound. I love it!
What does it have to do with the title of this post? Other than the band being an artsy/psychedelic/progressive rock band, not much. But I love it, so it stays.
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